I have been thinking about this for quite sometime now. What is it that my existence is for?
What is the purpose of my life? This has been more pronounced in the last couple of years now. Working on vtiger has been a fulltime life but there has to be an alternate life too. Every person is born with a purpose and I am still trying to figure out mine. In this regard, I have tried to do various things, for example :-
- Teaching students
- Having pets
- Joining Social Networks
- Blogging
- Love
- Worship
- Yoga
to name a few.
It has been interesting but often seems like touching the horizon. It is an ever-lasting search and seems to lead me through various lives and lifestyles but still remains elusive in the end.
It is a known fact that the Western world looks to the Eastern mysticism to answer some of these very queries. Well, let me tell you, even the Easterners are confused ;-)! Take me for example.
As I grow older, my responsibilities too grow more. Do they take me away from my search? I still do not know. It only seems to get thicker and thicker.
In one sense, it seems to be good as it is making me reach the target I suppose.
The night is the darkest just before dawn, right?
While coming to office, I see someone walking barefeet in the hot sun and it again makes me feel guilty for I have done nothing to help alleviate that person’s cause. My family tells me that I am not responsible for that and I alone cannot change the world.
But,
if everyone starts thinking this way, then no one will change the world. The least I can do is to change the world, 1 person at a time. That, will probably be somewhere in sync with what I want, what I strive for. At times, it seems that I am waiting to exhale for the very first time in my life.
Till then, the hurt continues, the pain continues, the search continues ….
I often think what it will be that people will discuss about me when I die. I am not sure what exactly they will say, but it should be along the lines of – ‘this guy found the purpose of his life and made sure that he served the purpose’.
I feel every person/thing exists for some reason. Once we find the reason, there is no stopping the knowledge, the expansion as life will be sensible at that time
